Please don't call CPS.

I tried really hard catch Russell in the act with my camera as many times as I could yesterday.

I caught him...

Feeding his breakfast to Penny.

In the Wyatt's cradle.

Playing on my laptop and then trying to hide when I walked into the room.

Shorts on his head, this is his signature move.

Basket on his head.

On the counter, sink on, having a cookie.

In the toy baby crib.

In the baby's swing.

Getting BACK into the toy baby crib.

Put these boots on about 15 times.

Broke the little thing of the blinds so he could walk around swinging it at people.

AND....while I typed that out, he pushed a chair over to the counter and got another cookie and got into the candy jar.

Russell is a biter. Yesterday he bit my arm twice, my hand once and my BUTT. My eye has developed a twitch recently but only when Russell is being Russell....and when Jared gets home from work. Coincidence? Not a chance.

Russell did lots of things that I didn't take pictures of as well. At one point he came running out of my bed room naked so I ran him to the potty, he peed and then I diapered him and put his shirt back on. I sat him on the couch and went to my bathroom to get his shorts. In that 3 seconds he climbed up onto the counter and stole my Diet Coke. That's just what we need...Russell Owen on caffeine! I went to go check on the baby, came back to the living room and Russell has taken his shorts off again and just knocked the trashcan over. Caught him shoving 2 cds into the Wii....no wonder that thing makes a growling noise when we try to play it.

Jared went home with his Uncle Dallas and Aunt Britanie yesterday afternoon so Wylee and Russell played together. They were playing in the toy kitchen so Russell grabbed a plastic spoon out of the real kitchen to eat his fake bread with. I found him gagging himself with it until his eyes were red and watery, and laughing every time he did it. Nice.
*Ok, while typing that out Russell brought me his diaper full of poop, with poop on his hand.*
He also ran into the living room with Jared's belt and hit me with it...over and over again, I couldn't get away from him.
And to finish the day off I found him in the hallway in nothing but a diaper scrubbing the floor with the toilet bowl brush...and it was wet.
So there you have it. That was a fraction of the excitement that takes place on a daily basis around here. Obviously I couldn't catch everything that he did yesterday. I need a nanny.

Anyone else think my 3.5 year old is a little too big for an excersaucer?

And just so you don't think my other kids are angels, here's a bonus story. We went to Wal-Mart last Monday like always and as I was checking out the old woman that was ringing my stuff up looked at me with a HORRIFIC look on her face like she was about to cry and frantically told me that Wylee had just woken the baby up by pinching his nose shut. It'll be a long time before I forget the look on that woman's face. All I could really do was turn around and say "Wylee, don't touch the baby and DON'T pinch his nose shut!" But what I wanted to say was, "Look lady, if that's the worst thing that happens to Wyatt today then I'm gonna consider it a good day. This cute little teddy bear that you've been waving to for the last 5 minutes has colored that baby's eyelids with markers, stuck a quarter in his mouth, slapped and bit him more times than I can count, and sat on him. Please don't call CPS."
On that note....I hope you all have a good hump day :)